Wednesday, December 22, 2010

An 8 year gap

I am number four of eight children. There is a nineteen year five month gap between number one and number eight. I have three sisters. One is eight years older than me, one is eight years younger than and one is five years older. [I have spelled out a lot of numbers!] Garen, number five also has about an eight years difference between  oldest and youngest brother but I don't have his perspective so I don't know how the age gap affected him.

This is how it has affected [or influenced] me.

Wendi is the best big sister you could ask for. Heavenly Father knew what he was doing when he sent her first. She is patient, kind and understanding.

My very first 'road trip' [from Meridian, Idaho to Ontario, Oregon] without parents was with Wendi. She was fourteen, I was six. It was one of the best days of my life. We were gone until it was dark outside.

As a child she taught me my Articles of Faith, made sure I read my scriptures each night (at the expense of the binding on her scriptures,) took me places and simply cared. We had many talks in the evenings that brought comfort and made memories. She also fixed my hair before school clear through 2nd grade.

When I was in Kindergarten I shared a room with Heather and Wendi had her own room. I LOVED being in there. She kept it under lock and key but she gave me a key. I would go in her room when she wasn't home and sit on her bed and look around. It was exactly the kind of bedroom I wanted to have when I was bigger.

When I was in second grade Gina was born. She is 8 years younger. I was given the same opportunity Wendi was to be the best big sister to Gina that Wendi was to me. There was only one problem. [Or three.] I am not patient, kind or understanding.

I secretly took pride in teasing Gina. I made fun of her, teased her friends, caused her bad dreams and pulled her hair when I fixed it.

When we shared a room I made her clean it herself. Sometimes we would 'exercise' in our room - dance around to a couple of songs and then eat beef jerky.

It's not secret, she bugged me big time and I am not good at hiding my true feelings. Good or bad.

Luckily, Gina became a human in the last 5 or so years and we are good friends.

Why am I telling you this?
Nicole and Anna are  8 years apart.
History is repeating itself...again.

Here are the facts from the last 39 days.

Nicole plays dolls with Anna, helps her pick her clothes out and sometimes fixes her hair.  They don't share blankets on the bed. Sometimes she reads to her.

Anna gets in Nicole's things things, copies everything she says and has found many of Nicole's 'buttons' - and pushes them.

This morning I was woken up by them arguing with each other...again. They don't share blankets because Nicole is a blanket hog and Anna sleeps sideways. Apparently Anna had kicked all her blankets to the foot of the bed and was trying to get Nicole's. This caused them both to start crying and feel frustrated. Ken went in [because he was already awake] and told one of them to come get in bed with me. I had to disclose the fact that I was awake when I told them neither of them could get it in my bed. They had to work it out or get up.

They didn't work it out so I told them to get up and get their room picked up. Five minutes later Anna was up and bouncing down the hall. [She bounces everywhere.] I called for Nicole to get out of bed and Anna copied what I said, also telling Nicole to get up. I reminded Anna that the kids don't like it when she copies me like this then I went down the hall to get Nicole up. I walked into her room, turned on her light and told her to wake up. Her response,

'I'm not sleeping. I'm taking deep breaths.'

I totally get that.

So far Nicole appears to be a happy medium between Wendi the older sister and Dedra the older sister. I haven't seen blatant torture occurring but I also never made Wendi cry.  Nicole reads to Anna and tells her to leave her alone. [not in the same sitting.] They like to dress alike. Nicole told me a couple weeks ago she wants to move out and without missing a breath Anna asked if she could keep the bed.

I've been a mom of two for eleven years. The banter that comes with it is not new to me. Throwing Anna into the mix has changed the dynamic. I like it.

Matthew is asking when we are getting another boy.

We're not.  :)

1 comment:

  1. I keep trying to comment on this, but am not aloud. just know i did comment and it WAS awesome.

    as usual.